Frank Bruni- A Gay Columnist For New York Times Is Not Married But Talks on A Man Having a Husband Is Normal! Indeed
Things have changed with time, and today people have become more open minded and accepting towards people’ sexual preferences. But things were not the same before when the people who preferred same sex were looked upon differently.
New York Times writer and journalist Frank Bruni, who has written many articles on Donald Trump, poured his heart out in his articles that show the fear, worries, pain, and struggle of a gay man while getting older in a society of change.
Frank had witnessed both the time when the relationship of the same sex was prohibited to the time when same sex marriage got legalized. Moreover, he is hopeful that the future generation would have to face comparatively lesser prejudices than his time.
Even after the legalization of gay marriage, Frank isn’t married yet, but talks on a man having a husband in normal indeed.
Frank Bruni’s Feelings In The Society Which Had Only Two Gender:
In Frank's article published on June 26, 2015, titled “Our Weddings, Our worth,” Frank Bruni shared his feelings at different ages.
Teenage is the time when one discovers many things about themselves. However, when Frank was a twelve years old boy, he was self-conscious and could not get comfortable with himself.
Further, he also discovered that his heart pounded fast for other boys, not girls and this sensation was intense and terrifying for a teenager, as it was not accepted in the society.
However, he also wished for some assurance that he would be spared from the disgust and disdain.
He has noticed that his heart beats faster not for girls but for other boys, and the sensation is as lonely and terrifying as it is intense.
He doesn’t know what to do about it. He’s sure he’ll be reviled for it, because he hears all of the bigoted jokes that people aren’t necessarily aware that they’re telling, all of the cruel asides that they don’t always realize that they’re muttering. He craves some assurance that he’ll be spared their disdain and disgust. But the world hasn’t given him any.
As a sixteen-year-old boy, Frank knew that there is a word for him, which were either gay or homosexual. One afternoon Frank went away from his friends and got into a bookstore, as he was seeking a way to subside the fear residing within himself. Frank described the feelings as,
He finds an examination of “being gay in America” that’s called “Alienated Affections.” The phrase rattles him. It sounds like a diagnosis or sinister prophecy. To understand it better, he riffles hurriedly through the pages, glancing over his shoulder repeatedly to make sure that no one’s watching, listening carefully for any approaching steps.
Turning the pages, Frank read the title of the first chapter that said,
“Beyond Gay or Gloomy: The Ordinary Miseries of Everyday Life.” Gloomy? Miseries?
But Frank could not find the strength to read it further and closed the book.
Back in 1981, when he was seventeen, Frank confessed his free-spirited mother that he was gay. But she told Frank not to reveal it to his father, as she felt it was too risky to handle and Frank’s mother wanted to handle the situation on her own.
A few years later, Frank’s mother told his father, but his father’s behavior did not change and used to give him a swift and sincere hug like before.
After Frank came out as gay, many related this to the courage, but he had his reason to do; which he revealed as,
I can speak for a 20-year-old college student. He has opened up to his family and to many friends about who he is, not because he possesses any particular courage but because being honest involves less strain, less effort, than keeping secrets and dreading their exposure. Also because he wants to meet men like him, develop crushes he can act on, even fall in love.
Frank was overwhelmed with the acceptance from his family who tried to understand him, and also he shared the wish of young Frank,
But he wishes there were a way to be honest without wearing a tag, without being put in a category, without one adjective preceding all others when people describe him. Their tendency do so is a constant reminder that he’s not “normal.”
Frank highlighted the legal aspect of the situation and consequences of having the same sex partner as,
It’s illegal in many places for two men or two women to have sex. It’s legal in most places for them to be fired because of who and how they love. Even the language in public discussions sends an ugly signal. People are congratulated for their “tolerance” of gays and lesbians.
He is someone to be tolerated.
Caption: An American Journalist, Frank Bruni who was named restaurant critic for The New York Times in April 2004.
Photo Credit: frankbrunibooks.com
The 30 years old Frank lived in the suburbs with a man of his age, but the romantic partners had restrictions as the society where they lived never approved their relationship. He expressed his fear as,
They have never hugged in the front yard, never kissed in front of a window, because what would the neighbors think? What would the neighbors do?
The romantic partner never thought of having children, and the reason behind it was,
The man and his partner have never spoken of children, because that would involve special, intricate arrangements and because most people don’t really approve.
When Frank became a man of 45 years old, he witnessed the gay and lesbian couples starting families. Thus, he felt that if one lives in the right places they blend in well.
Further, one after another, states legalized same sex marriage and Supreme Court ordered the states to do so as the Constitution demanded and protected their rights as well.
The 50 years old Frank could not believe it got legalized, as it seemed nearly impossible to young Frank, but now everything had changed for good. However, the Supreme Court’s decision had other implications too, which Frank described as,
And that’s because the Supreme Court’s decision wasn’t simply about weddings. It was about worth. From the highest of this nation’s perches, in the most authoritative of this nation’s voices, a majority of justices told a minority of Americans that they’re normal and that they belong — fully, joyously and with cake.
As Frank said, it's normal for a man to have a husband; but the question which has been lingering in people's mind is- Does he have any upcoming plans of getting married?
Well, he certainly seems to have some plans for the near future, but it remains a mystery until any revelation for the man himself!
Stay with us to stay updated on Frank Bruni!